After being in Haiti for 5 months you don’t really think you are going to see many ‘firsts’ but today I did. A woman came in and sat down and began to give us her information. Her voice was very hoarse and I figured she had pharyngitis or layrnigitis. Then she begins to tell me about how when she was pregnant she really enjoyed the smell of gasoline and kerosene. I didn’t think much about it as I know that pregnancy does strange things to you but I was a little concerned that maybe it had impacted the baby. Upon further investigation that was 5 years ago when she was pregnant and she is currently ‘smelling’ or as we call it, ‘huffing’, kerosene 6-7 times per day. She is very worried as her voice has changed, she cannot eat and she cannot stop. Trying to quit for 3 days caused her massive headaches, irritability and sickness…yeah, I imagine it would.
I felt so incredibly bad for this woman as she had no idea about addiction and that basically she had become physically, emotionally and mentally dependent on this substance. It is unlike drug addiction in the US where people understand what is happening but are too far removed to be able to do anything about it. She had absolutely no idea what was happening, she just knew she liked the smell of this product. My heart ached for her knowing that there are no ‘rehab’ programs here and that without serious intervention she would likely die from this habit. I told her I want to see her weekly which is all the time I can give to her, though part of me wants to house her here and try to get her weaned from this addiction. She has 3 children at home who need a mother who can care for them. I tried to tell her all the health risks which she seemed to really be affected by but without the knowledge of what is happening she really cannot fathom what it will be like to try and stop. I told her without any sugar coating that it was going to be one of the most if not the most difficult things she has ever done and that I would be there to help her but I am acutely aware of the drug rehabilitation rates in the US where we have facilities on every corner so sadly I fear that beating this may not be feasible. However, as long as she comes back and wants help I will work with her and do everything I can to help her get her life back. I think she was just thankful that someone finally told her about “addiction” and that she can release the self reproach she has been feeling about how she can’t just ‘stop’ doing this even though everyone else tells her she can.
Empowerment comes in all forms I guess.
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